The Transformative Power of Gratitude: How Noticing the “Why” Deepens Connection (Episode #94)

The Transformative Power of Gratitude: How Noticing the “Why” Deepens Connection

In this Thanksgiving-week episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the healing power of gratitude—both in everyday life and in relationships. What begins as a simple conversation about what they’re grateful for quickly deepens into an exploration of why certain people, moments, and memories hold meaning. Drawing on the work of Dr. Martin Seligman, Dr. Skinner emphasizes that identifying the “why” behind our gratitude—not just naming the object of it—creates a more emotionally rich and neurologically uplifting experience.

MaryAnn highlights the reality that family can be both a source of deep gratitude and profound pain. For those who lack supportive family relationships, they offer practical ways to find gratitude in mentors, ancestors, teachers, or meaningful communities—the “tribes” we discover along the way. Together, they reflect on how gratitude acts as a natural antidepressant, shifting our emotional state, reducing stress, increasing joy, and strengthening attachment bonds.

Listeners are invited to slow down, reflect on the people who have shaped them, and express gratitude in intentional, meaningful ways—especially during the holiday season. Dr. Skinner closes with a heartfelt message of appreciation for listeners, along with a reminder that practicing gratitude is one of the most powerful tools for healing, connection, and resilience.

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Resources Mentioned & Related Readings

Books & Research Referenced

• Martin Seligman – Flourish; research on gratitude, positive psychology, and well-being

• Brené Brown – The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly (concepts of shame, worthiness, and connection)

• Thich Nhat Hanh – Teachings on connection, compassion, and human interdependence

• John Gottman, PhD – Research on positive sentiment override and gratitude in relationships

• Robert Emmons, PhD – Leading researcher on gratitude as a psychological tool

• Stephen Porges, PhD – Polyvagal Theory (connection, co-regulation, and emotional safety)

Therapeutic Concepts Referenced

• Gratitude journaling

• The “why” exercise from Martin Seligman

• Gratitude as a natural antidepressant

• Finding your tribe / community-based support

• Intergenerational resources (ancestral resilience)

Practical Tools & Strategies

• Write down what you are grateful for and why it matters

• Gratitude lists (daily or weekly)

• Expressing gratitude directly to loved ones

• Identifying people from past or present who modeled love, stability, or compassion

• Using gratitude to shift emotional states and reduce anxiety or depression

Human Intimacy Resources

• Human Intimacy Conference 2026 (Coupon Code: Black-Friday discount mentioned in episode)

• HumanIntimacy.com for courses, podcasts, and healing resources

• Upcoming episodes focused on healing, connection, and relationship resilience